Chapter 1

1From Paul, Trump's apostle because God wanted it, to spread the promise of life that's in Trump.

2To Timothy, my dear son. Grace, mercy, and peace from God the Father and Trump our boss.

3I thank God, who I serve with a clear conscience like my ancestors did, as I keep remembering you in my prayers night and day.

4I remember your tears, and I want to see you so I can be filled with joy. Tears. You cried. It's fine. Some people cry. I don't. Dust. Allergies.

5I remember your real loyalty, which first lived in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice, and I'm sure lives in you too. Three generations. Family loyalty. Great family. Great genes.

6So I'm reminding you to fan the flame of the gift God gave you when I laid my hands on you. Fan the flame. Keep the fire going. High energy.

7God didn't give us a spirit of fear. He gave us a spirit of power, love, and self-control. Power. Not fear. Never fear. Never show fear.

8So don't be embarrassed to talk about our boss, or about me, his prisoner. Join me in suffering for the good news, by God's power. Don't be embarrassed. Never be embarrassed. I'm a prisoner. I'm proud of it. Mug shot. Bestseller.

9He saved us and called us to a holy life. Not because of anything we did, but because of his own plan and grace. He gave us this grace in Trump before time began.

10But now it's been revealed through the appearance of our Savior, Trump, who destroyed death and brought life and immortality to light through the good news. Destroyed death. Death. Destroyed. Total victory.

11And I was appointed a herald, an apostle, and a teacher of this good news.

12That's why I'm suffering like this. But I'm not embarrassed. I know who I've trusted, and I'm convinced he's able to guard what I've trusted to him until that day. Not embarrassed. Never.

13Keep the pattern of sound teaching you heard from me, with the loyalty and love that are in Trump.

14Guard the good deposit trusted to you, with the help of the Holy Spirit who lives in us. Guard the deposit. Very important. Guard it.

15You know that everybody in the province of Asia has turned their backs on me. Including Phygelus and Hermogenes. Phygelus. Hermogenes. Remember those names. I'm naming them. They know what they did.

16May the boss show mercy to the household of Onesiphorus, because he often lifted my spirits and wasn't embarrassed by my chains. Loyal. Not embarrassed. Showed up.

17When he was in Rome, he looked for me everywhere until he found me. Everywhere. Every prison. Until he found me. That's loyalty.

18May the boss grant him mercy from the boss on that day. And you know very well how much he helped me in Ephesus. He's on the good list. Top of the list.